Thought Provoking

So when is this “Old enough to know better” supposed to kick in?

The fact that there’s a highway to Hell and only a stairway to Heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic numbers.

My people skills are just fine.
It’s my tolerance of idiots that needs work.
(very true!)

I’m only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.

Every day, thousands of INNOCENT plants are killed by vegetarians.
Help end the violence, eat bacon.

Have you ever listened to someone for a while then wondered…
“Who ties your shoelaces for you?”

I prefer not to think before speaking.
I like being just as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth!

Be careful when you follow the masses.
Sometimes the “M” is silent.

I can explain it to you┬ábut I can’t understand it for you.

I hate it when the voices in my head go silent.
I never know what they are planning.

I’m not lazy!
I just really enjoy doing nothing.

When you’re dead, you don’t know you’re dead. It’s only difficult for others.
It’s the same way when you’re stupid.

If people could read my mind…
I’d get punched in the face a lot.

Calm down. Take a deep breath,
and hold it for 20 minutes.

I never argue.
I just explain why I’m right.

I speak my mind
because it hurts to bite my tongue all the time.

Don’t confuse my personality with my attitude…
My Personality is who I am.
My Attitude depends on who you are!

Sometimes I sit quietly and wonder why I’m not in a Mental Asylum…
Then I take a look around and realise…
Maybe I already am!

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